What have you learned this year??

My 8th grade students are taking their final today and the essay prompt is, "What have you learned about yourself this year?"

As the pages flipped and pencils scratched, I began to think about what I am asking of them. Reflection. Introspection. Confession.

This has been a year of change for me, mostly in regards to my spirit. I feel alive! Reborn! I feel like I did in high school when I was ON FIRE for Christ! I've learned that I am happiest and most fulfilled when my thoughts, words and actions are glorifying My Savior! I've learned that if I read the Bible then the Holy Spirit will guide my thoughts and reveal truths to me, truths that have been on my nightstand for 31 years. My New Year's Resolution for the past 5 years has been to read my Bible more. I actually started doing this last summer with a study of David. Then Ester. Now Love. If all of this knowledge has been here, why haven't I been diving into it? My ignorance baffles me. My sin humbles me. But My God loves me!

I've learned that I have questions about the Bible and my faith. Not doubts, just questions. I want to learn more so that I can share more. The drive for this is heavy on my heart right now. I have felt unsettled in my job for the past year. I've wondered what God has in store for my future. How long will I teach? What is next? What does He want for me? From me?

My students this year have been amazing. I began this year full of doubt and fear. They had a reputation. I wondered if I would "love" them. How am I going to teach this bunch of kids? I haven't been teaching for many years, but it was my first year to receive nothing for Christmas or Teacher Appreciation. "What am I doing wrong?" I wasn't concerned for selfish reasons. I don't need "things" from the students, I just appreciate a word of thanks from them. But, this was the year that I received a Mother's Day card from a student. A Birthday present from another. Mrs. Ora, our custodian, told me that, "Even Jesus couldn't reach 'em all....but if you just reach one then you're doin' all right." I'm trying, Mrs. Ora. Lord knows I am.

Visit to Crandall - Mother's Day

Few people can boast that every visit to the in-laws is an adventure, but I can.

A crowd of folks greeted us as we unfolded ourselves from the car. I didn't even know everyone, but I did recognize the Cheshire smiles of my family. The boys played basketball in the driveway for hours while the girls chased the kids and got dinner ready. Harper skipped around the yard in a pink tu-tu and a flower headband.



All was well until DRAMA pulled up to the house. The new guest, who wasn't on the guest list, stayed for almost two hours. The mood quickly changed from lighthearted and silly to tense. I kept wondering, "God, you have me here for a reason....what is it?" I'm not sure what the Big Guy wanted to teach me, but I did get to see my mother-in-law try to stall and distract the guest with all the sincerity she could muster. Grace under fire.


On Saturday morning the boys squeezed into Brianna's VW Bug to go play golf. The girls piled into the SUV for retail therapy. Well, the retail wasn't great and we needed therapy afterward! After time in the car with the Cauley girls my belly hurts from the laughs. I think it was my mother-in-law that said, "There's no such thing as a functional family!" The three of them: Jill, Renee and Brianna, are so lucky to have each other.


Harper and Baylor got plenty of snuggles from Mimi, Papaw and Aunt Brianna. Uncle Clint got one or two.

EASTER

Harper had a blast making Easter eggs at Juju's house. She made special eggs for Juju, Poppy, Baylor and Jesus.

After she searched for the eggs on Sunday, she cracked 'em, peeled 'em and fed 'em to Memphis.



Baylor likes smashing the eggs together!

Nick and his girls

Sweet Baby Face

Baylor Kate, my precious one year old, has just turned on her personality! She tinkers around the house all night long with an old cell phone tucked under her ear or draped in Mardi Gras beads. She is usually content unless she is hungry, like me, or sleepy, like Nick.

Lately she is getting frustrated with big sister. "She is going to turn around and smack you," I've warned. The other day she had enough. She took a handful of blonde curls into her sweaty palm and YANK! Harper was easily consoled and Baylor strutted around the room in victory...free from big sis.

10 Reasons Why I Love My Job

There are so many reasons why I love my job! I mean it. I feel blessed to work in position that fulfills my spirit. This year has been a doozy! The students have worked hard and we finally completed LEAP testing this week. To celebrate we enjoyed an afternoon at the Dubach pond. We didn't have fish for dinner but a good time was had by all.

I've got an ankle...

Another morning of laundry, coffee and God's word. I started the Love Dare today! Patience. I KNOW I can use this.

Harper walked into the laundry room where I was folding clothes for our trip to Texas. In her arms she cradled her silver piggy bank wrapped in a fleece blanket.

"Mommy, I've got an ankle."

My first thought was, "Well yes, actually, you have two," but I couldn't tell where her thoughts were headed so I kept quiet.

"See Mommy, I've got an ankle on my little booby," she said, proudly looking down her nose at the tiny FRECKLE on her chest.

"Oh, you mean freckle," I politely corrected, trying to contain my giggles.

A Mama Moment

I am not a tv addict. I LOVE music videos and have logged countless hours switching from GAC, CMT, MTV(only very early in the morning) and VH1. There are very few shows I feel drawn to, but the short list consists of: American Idol and Dancing With the Stars. I used to watch Grey's but have boycotted the show due to the liberal agenda. If I want to watch trash I'll just watch "Rock of Love" on VH1, at least I'll know what I'm getting into.

Normally I consider these two shows family friendly and make a special point to let Harper overtake my lap and watch with me. If fact, all four of us watch Idol. Last year Harper would change into her various costumes to watch DWTS so she could "look pretty" like the girls shimmying in fringe and sequins. So far it has been comical, sweet even.


We missed last weeks show, only catching a glimpse of Pamela Anderson in a hot pink loin cloth. With just a minute to watch before bath Harper declared, "Ohhh Mama, That's me in the pink! I'm gonna be her!"

That's when it happened.

TV suddenly became the enemy robbing my sweet little girl of her....little girlness! "Her!" I thought. "You wanna be HER!"

After my blood pressure came down, the tv was already off, and I tucked in my two angels, my mind went back to my responsibility as a parent. Why does my 4 year old immediately feel drawn to the vixen? Is it because that is the only dancer we saw during our brief encounter with the show or is that definition of "beauty" already ingrained in her mind? Either way, I've got some prayin' to do!

The first thing that came to mind was "Clothe yourselves in humility.."

Last night we continued our ritual,giving the show another chance, and plopped into our seats for the excitement of the ballroom. As the dancers were introduced, again Harper proclaimed, "Ohhh Mama, there's me again!" just as Pam pranced down the steps paying tribute to Marilyn Monroe. "No, that's not you Harper...that's you," I encouraged, pointing out Erin Andrews and Chelsey Hightower, both blonde beauties like Harper. She agreed that she could be Chelsey, not that other girl. "Whew," small victory.

We watched several dances, including Pamela's, but her comments after her dance really opened my eyes. I'm sure Harper doesn't catch on to the crude humor among the judges and contestants, but I do, and I just didn't feel right about it last night.

Click. We turned it off. It was that easy.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not blaming a show, Pamela Anderson or "the media." I'm not pointing the finger at anyone because then there would be four fingers pointing right back at me. I remember dressing up like Dolly Parton when I was, well....that was just last year, but I mean, when I was a kid I did it too! : ) Maybe there is something fascinating about that figure, I'm not sure. All I know is that good ole Pam and her knockers are just one more reminder that this Mama needs to stay on her knees in prayer for her two angels.